"There is treasure to be desired and oil in
the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it all.” Proverbs 21:20
Luckily, I learned the value of this scripture in Proverbs while still in my 20's. It became my battle-cry for change. Living paycheck to paycheck was stressful and always made me feel like I was failing. I didn't put it all together until I realized what I thought was budgeting, really wasn't. Having a bit of money left at the end of the month is just luck, not a budget. A Budget is deliberately telling your money where to go. This means setting limits on how much you spend in certain categories (like eating out or fun activities) to make sure you can hit your goals. On the flip side, it also gives you permission to spend in areas that would previously cause stress. Clothing was this way for me. We would go a couple of months without buying anything and then all of sudden spent $100 or more. It always killed me.
So where do you get started if you are sick and tired of this frustration?
1~ There is no such thing as a perfect budget. It changes month to month and most of the time during the course of a month.
2~ A budget is month specific- This month's income vs. expenses. You don't plan for the average of your utility bill. You plan for what it is that month.
3~ Use cash for everyday expenses and categories that you have a hard time controlling. This is my secret budgeting weapon because it's simple. When the envelope is empty you stop spending until the next month or pay period. This is where creative meals with leftovers turns into a character building moment. I only have 4 cash categories- Groceries, Clothing, Eating out, and Baby. If you are leery of carrying cash, only get out what you need for that week or pay period. Over time it will get easier.
4~ If you are married, both of you need to give input AND agree on the budget. Nothing is worse for a marriage than for one partner to feel like the other came down from Mount Sinai with the budget on stone tablets. This also means that if you need to adjust something, you agree to change it together. No, this does not mean after the fact saying, "By the way, there was a really great sale on [fill in the blank]. I just had to get them even though we didn't have anything left in that category." If you are having trouble getting on the same page financially with your spouse, take some time to dream together. Something like, "You know, someday I really want to be able to visit..." or "Wouldn't you love to drive a... someday?" Or my personal favorite, "I can't wait to be able to just give crazy amounts of money to people in need!" Find that common ground and make that your "why".
"If you have a strong enough why, you can get through almost any how."
I heard this quote earlier this week and knew I had to include it. The why is your motivation to keep going. Another great idea is to post pictures around your house to remind you why you are sacrificing X and Y now, to have Z later. If this doesn't work, you have more serious marriage problems that need to be addressed with a trained therapist or counselor. Trust me, we've been there and it will help.
5~ Once your budget is established and you are out of debt, use that extra money to invest. Even as little as $100/month can make all the difference. We're literally talking weekly pizza or latte money here.
Taking control of your money is hard. While paying off debt and learning to save is hard, it's a lot harder to be facing retirement trying to figure out how to live off of Social Security. So please stop eating your retirement! It makes for some awfully expensive poop down the road.
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